GLOOMY TUESDAY

Hey all what's up? I finally have my time to post something on here! So, won't take any much longer, here it goes!!!

Well, technically yesterday was valentine’s day, but to me it’s just Tuesday. Why? Since I’m moeslim and they say there is no valentine for us, so I go with that. But if you wanna celebrate it, it’s up to you! You don’t have to take my words seriously, okay?

Right, since I didn’t celebrate valentine this year or like before because… maybe because I’m single! Hell yeah I lost count how many times I’ve pasted valentine without boyfriend or something, I do still have friends anyway! Don’t forget that! And I’m not 'forever alone'!! I hate those words! Who created it? Couldn’t they make it softer? It hurts you know!

I’d love to use words like, 'single for a while' better than that crap! Stop using those words from now on, okay?

Jadi, kenapa gua ngasih judul post-an gue ‘Gloomy Tuesday’?

Mau tau? Baiklah!

Intinya gue itu galau mendadak di tanggal 14 februari 2012 yang bertepatan dengan hari valentine atau hari selasa kemarin.

Kenapa gue galau? Apa yang membuat gue galau? Begini ceritanya….

Jadi, hari selasa itu gue pulang sekolah. Setelah sampe rumah gue melakukan hal yang biasa gue lakukan, ganti baju lalu tiduran di kamar sambil mainin blackberry gue. Hal gue lakukan adalah bukan bbm-an, tapi gue twitteran.

Saat gue sedang me-refresh TL di twitter for blackberry gue, tiba-tiba gue liat username the-boy-who-can’t-be-named muncul di TL gue.

Nah, mungkin biar lebih jelas, hubungan gue dengan 'boy' itu adalah kakak kelas dan adik kelas sewaktu gue smp. Tapi, mungkin kalian perlu tau, I have feeling for him for over 3 years, it’s long time I know! I just don’t know why I still can’t get over him even though it’s clear he doesn’t like me that way, EVER! He only see me as friend, even his sister.

Kalian tau kan kalo punya feeling ke seseorang gimana? Oke! Kemudian setelah itu gue stalk twitternya. Rata-rata isi TLnya yang seputar boys gitu ga jauh jauh dari bola, tapi ada satu yang mencolok mata dan hati gue.

Disitu gue liat dia mentionan sama entah bener atau salah, adik kelasnya. Kenapa gue bisa bilang gitu? Ya karena that 'boy' manggil ke dia itu ‘De’ dan dia itu cewe.

Bukan hanya mentionan, tapi that 'boy' was flirting with her on twitter! Repeat, flirting!

Mungkin kalian nganggep itu biasa, tapi itu sakit menurut gue. That 'boy' yang awalnya ga pernah manggil gue dengan sebutan ‘De’ tiba-tiba manggil gue dengan kata itu saat dia men-DM dan BBM gue. Gue masih terima saat itu. Tapi lama kelamaan that 'boy' makin tambah cuek sama gue. Kemana dia yang dulu? Kemana dia yang gue tau bakal manggil gue dengan nama gue sendiri ketimbang ‘De’? kemana dia yang mau gue ajak jalan, walaupun belum tercapai sampe saat ini? I want the old him back!!

After of all, gue ga bermaksud suudzon tapi gue punya firasat dia benci sama gue. Entah apa yang telah gue lakukan, dia menjauhi gue.

Gue harap gue ga suudzon dan ini semua salah, gue ga bisa bohong tapi gue masih mau deket sama dia. Entah daya tarik apa yang membuat gue susah move on dari dia.

And that’s what I called gloomy tuesday! It’s not really sad when you read that, but if you were me, you could feel the pain inside.

Anyway, happy valentine for you (sorry i'm late), wether a couple or not! And thank you for wasted your time to read this post of me. Love, xoxo.